Monday, May 4, 2009

Whattya know? Underwire DOES make a difference.

When I was in my 20's I would buy cute little bra and panty sets. I always matched. Always. I had stipe-y sets, polka dotted sets, lace sets, print sets.

I met Furry Husband and we got married and my money went toward other things like a mortgage, hay for the horses, home improvements, life insurance. All those mundane items needed a portion of my paycheck and I guess cute bras and panty sets fell by the wayside.

When I say wayside, I mean they fell off a cliff, into a never ending crevasse that ends in a black worm hole into outer space never to be seen again.

This weekend we were up early because the cats ran out of food for five minutes and all six of the little hair pigs were tap dancing on our heads or stomping across our full bladders demanding we get up to feed them. As IF they've ever really missed a meal. Fur pigs.

I grabbed a bra out of my bra drawer. The elastic isn't beginning to fray, there aren't any holes in it, all the hooks are still there, it's not stained with red hair dye since I only wear my bra when I'm dying my hair and I always get a drip or two on the bra I'm wearing.

In my book, this makes it one of my better bras!

Oh - yeah. I forgot. The underwire came out of one cup. Hmph. Well how much of a difference can it make?

I put the bra on. One cup with underwire and one cup without. I sought out Furry Husband's advice. I asked him in all seriousness. "Hey honey? Can you even really tell which side has underwire?"

He looked at me.

He started laughing. He was crying and could hardly breathe he was laughing so hard. His face was turning purple. I thought I'd have to open up a little CPR on him in a minute...

He pushed me into the bathroom to have a look in the mirror...



I guess it DOES make a difference!

One of my girls was just as cute and perky as could be. The other one? Not so much. She looked like a wet fish stuck in a sock.

Once I put a shirt on - (and you really couldn't tell under a shirt what was goin' on with my girls) - Furry Husband recovered his composure and gave me an order. "You are going out to buy a bra TODAY!"


DebH said...

Now that was a story my sister would love..I am sending that on.
She talks about hers in just the same me...I got lucky.
Had Cancer , and booby and a fixmeup on the other one. Had I known the torture,,I would of definitely chose different. Now though, I wait for the real one to drop to the navel while the memorex one is still high and mighty!! Don't recommend Breast Cancer,,but it does have its PERKS!!

olivia said...


Imagining a black hole full of swirling cute, lacy underwear sets.

A lot of the times the ads/lines they sell are full of crap, but sometimes they're spot on (underwire and Tshirtproof bras in this latter list) ... the danger is in determining which. :)

Shanster said...

DebH - you are funny! I'm so glad tho' that you are a SURVIVOR!!!

Oliva - yes, I agree and usually buy whatever is on sale! Poor cute underwear sets... they are never on the clearance rack! :)

Foxxy said...

Bra buying used to be so fun for me. Once I gained weight and my cup size hit the D's it became torture. I absolutely hate underwire but without it...there is the sag factor. I loved this and emailed the link to my mother.

Iowa Victory Gardener said...

Funny stuff here ... I honestly have to say I have never read a blog post about a bra before this! This surely must qualify for some sort of award....

Shanster said...

Foxxy - I know huh? It just doesn't make sense why a wire would make any difference??

IVG - Oh yes, you get an award, you brave, brave soul you!