Thursday, June 11, 2009

Never a dull moment!

I got home from work Tuesday night and I headed straight for the bathroom cuz my bladder is the size of a small acorn. Furry Husband was yelling at me from the living room, "Hey - the goats are all running around really crazy! (pause) Oh! (pause) Hey - can you come here?!"

Why does everything exciting happen when I'm on the toidy peeing??

When I was able, I came into the living room to look out the window.

Our buck was in the doe pen! All three does were racing around like stock cars in the Indy 500 and the buck was in hot pursuit.

The wooden spool we have in the buck pen as a shade maker and as his play toy to jump on had migrated across his pen to the fence separating him from the girls. He jumped up and over into the doe pen. It's the first unintentional "buck is with the does" incident in the time we've had goats. And here I was, feeling smarmy that our buck has never gotten in with the does.

That'll teach me!

Of course we ran out to remedy the situation. I grabbed up ol' bucky boy and walked him to his pen. He was wound up but good! I had to grab his beard to keep him under control... which is like grabbing someone's ear to make them follow you.

Furry Husband moved the spool to another area.

I inspected the doe's hoo-ha's. (what a heart-warming picture perfect moment... me closely inspecting goat va-jay-jays)

I don't think anyone was violated.

It isn't mating season. No one was in heat and if a doe isn't in heat, they don't let the bucks near them.

The buck wasn't doing any of his mating rituals (stomping his front leg, sticking his tongue out and making odd Chewbacca like love calls). Our buck isn't in rut right now because it's not mating season.

I'm guessing if the buck is like any other red-blooded male, he COULD be ready for action at any given moment. I think we caught things right as they happened and there was no harm done. Hopefully he was just happy to have other goats to play with not mate with.

We will mark our calendar and keep watch in November just in case. Yeesh. Never a dull moment!

Milk production went down the next milking because of the excitement. Spot was the doe most traumatized. Her milk production plummeted. Poor Spot! The does are all back to normal milk production and everyone is fine. The does look relieved. The buck looks disappointed.


Kelley said...

HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!!HA!HA!HA!HA!!!!! I could totally see that in my head.... especially you taking a good look at your girls "virtue"!!! : )
Thanks for the laugh!!!

olivia said...


It's the law of the universe that all excitement happens when you're on the toilet ... :)

That's hilarious. Glad everyone escaped w/out incident (knock wood).

Heather said...

Haha! You know, I was about floored when standing in line at the grocery store when i saw "Va-jay-jay" printed on the front of Cosmo. Not that I don't expect it from Cosmo, but I couldn't believe someone didn't stop that from reaching newsstands! What about the kids! Be discreet, save it for the second page! Though, I can't argue that it is a cheerful and fun way to reference the 'gina.

DebH said...

now that made me guffaw out loud. Been there and could see it exactly as you describe. Always something..I got home to see all the girls had escaped and were happily munching on the evergreens. I had just remarked (out loud) the other that has never happened...Jinxed!! I had an especially eventfull time catching my "wild ass" goat..LucyFur..and by the end..if I hadn't almost tipped over the golf cart chasing her down the property..I could be having goat stew today. Seems the realization of my overheated driving and trying to rope from a fast moving golf cart isn't such a good idea. Slowed me down alot and I came to my senses in time to just let one of my sweethearts back out and let her follow her back in. Everyone is OK today,,but on probation!!

Cheryl said...

I can"t help thinking, if he had been looking for some action despite the does not being in heat, what nerve! Poor Spot! It reminds me of this program I saw about wild horses. The new head horse guy kept trying to force himself on the head female horse even though she wanted none of him because she was pregnant with another horse's foal. Of course the new head horse guy kills the foal soon after it's born and then she accepts him. It seems brutal to me, but of course I can't put human morality onto a horse - or a goat!

Foxxy said...

Hahaha ..."Shanster the Vah-jay-jay Inspector!" I love it. Truly, never a dull moment.

Shanster said...

Kelley - anytime!

Olivia - everything exciting happens when you are on the toilet too? I'm glad I'm not the only one! heh heh

Heather - I saw that too and was thinking wtf? Lots better than a lot of other things for sure! I heard the term "meat curtains" the other day and about died!

DebH - NEVER feel smarmy or say anything outloud... it'll jinx us for sure! LucyFur is a fantastic name and how you rope anything is beyond me... I'd have to tackle it! I don't know how to rope!

Cheryl - nature IS brutal! I think the does were thinking the exact same thing... the NERVE of that guy!