Nature is scary

Before bed, I was going out to let the dogs out, I open the door.  And on the threshold of the doorway was this GIGANTIC spider... I have NEVER seen a spider this big.  I thought it was a tarantula... it was so hairy and giant... (I did hold a tarantula at the butterfly pavillion so I have seen one up close and personal)  I mean - HUGE.  And it RUNS INTO OUR KITCHEN.

Well - a black bear cub was spotted in the neighborhood this week... Furry Husband has been all on high alert for a bear.  Which I am not cuz bears don't hunt horses right?  Anyway - Furry Husband is all nervous about the bear and keeps talking about the bear...

So this mo'fo tarantula runs into our kitchen and I'm going "OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD!" 

Seriously.

That thing was as big as a baby kitten and just as hairy. 

If I had seen it outside I would have been "oh cool!"...it's another thing when this giant spider unexpectedly runs into your kitchen ready to stage a coup.

Furry Husband comes running thinking there is a bear just outside our front door....

and I am pointing at the spider...

and I'm screaming - "SHOO IT OUT!  DON'T KILL IT!"

Well he tried to shoo it out, but it feinted right and faked Furry Husband out and he accidentally stepped on it and I was covering my face -"OMG, GROSS, OMG, OMG -  I CAN'T LOOK!"   and Furry Husband is like - well honey... here is a leg... and over here is a leg... I am just covering my eyes and waiting for the horror to end...

Once the carnage is cleaned up... he goes outside to make sure the horses are safe from the bear....

I guess he was walking in the dark, he told me he was watching where he stepped cuz I always tell him that he never looks where he is walking (which he doesn't and good thing he listened to me for one time in his life last night...) and right as he was stepping, there was this thing...

He tried to step over it... he didn't have his glasses on tho' and it ended up being one of the larger fist size toads we have around our place this year.

Right as Furry Husband tried to step over it, it jumped up, hit his leg and slid down and he was all "UG!  OOK!  GAH!"  trying to avoid stepping on the frog and losing his balance, pinwheeling his arms and being grossed out that it just slid down his leg....

He tells me all this.... and I say in a hushed whisper with huge, dilated pupils:   "Honey.  Nature is scary."