Oh. GEEZ!

I was sitting at work innocently listening to NPR cuz generally it's the least offensive station... it's not hard core rap or head banging metal or swirly, twirly country ballads ...

I turned it up a notch listening to a story on Jewish deli food. Cuz. Well. ANYTHING about food captures my full and undivided attention...

And then the story moved on and I tuned out --- comforting NPR voices gently mumbling away over to my right

And then?


And then I hear the word "vagina" and "penetration" and "fluid"

Oh - good grief! Where is the volume button and why did the building's white noise machine turn off just at the very moment those words were spoken?! They were ECHOING around the suite... vagina vagina vagina......

Geez, oh, geez, oh geez!

I don't even want to think about vaginas or penetrating or fluids with ANY of the people I work with.

What happened to the talk about pastrami on rye? What about mustard and kosher and and... where'd the FOOD go?

Shew...

I turned the radio way low...

It's some crazy story about countries where it's important to marry virgins. Some genius developed a fake vagina virgin contraption. It provides some sort of barrier and some fake blood.

Wow. Talk about inventions. Who was the test group for THAT product?

Hey! (light bulb over my noggin) Maybe I could go as a virgin for Halloween!

Oh.

Wait.

I guess no one would be able to tell what I was exactly....